This Is What “I Feel Fat” Means

9 Tips for Coping with Family Visits and Holidays

Note: If you are going to be in an environment with abusive people, some things on this list may help you but others will not. In such a case, focus on safety planning for yourself. Get a therapist, a friend, or an advocate at a domestic violence program to help you make a plan. Enjoying…

Diet Talk: How to Respond

You are in line at a buffet and the person next to you says, “Oh my God, I’m going to regret this tomorrow!” Or you are at dinner with friends and someone says, “I wish I could have that but I’m being good today!” Or you are talking with a relative you haven’t seen in…

16 Surprising Things That Might Make You Happier

There are a lot of ideas out there about what will make you happier. Some of them are ones we hear about a lot (eg. gratitude). Others are more surprising. Following is a list of 16 surprising things that research has shown might make you happier in some way. Having plants and flowers in your…

Bring Curiosity With You on the Holidays

Holidays with family are stressful. Whether you celebrate Ramadan, Passover, Christmas, Diwali or anything else, time spent with family over holidays can be difficult and make you feel like a kid again. So what are we to do? There are lots of ways to improve your coping strategies, learn better communication skills and find ways…

What Happens When Fear Wins?

A colleague recently posed an interesting question as a topic for a blog post: What happens when fear wins? My answer: if the fearful part of you “wins” and prevents you from doing something, give that part of you a trophy. And then pay attention to the fearful part because that part is probably really…

Top 5 Lessons Learned about Myself as a Therapist

I have been a therapist for 20 years now and I have learned a lot about myself: My strengths as a therapist are also my limitations. I am a strong thinker, good at analyzing and making connections and understanding new things. These are strengths that help me in my work. However, my strengths are also…

Radical Acceptance, Radical Change

Here’s a copy of a video I did on my Facebook page. I invite you to find and follow me there!

How Your Communication Style Affects Others

Sometimes it is helpful to understand the impact your communication style has on other people. While every interaction is different, there are some common reactions people have to different communication styles. If you are aggressive, other people may react to you with fear or anxiety. They may be timid around you because they don’t want…

Action is Better Than Tea

After there is a mass shooting or other horrifying event, I sometimes see articles written by therapists on how to cope. They talk about self-care, reducing exposure to media and getting support. You know, drink herbal tea, eat right, do some yoga, go to therapy. Things like that. While I am very much in favor…