Lots of people seem to worry about whether a therapist will see something about them as pathological. In my opinion as a psychotherapist, there is nothing inherently problematic about being: Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender Genderqueer Asexual Polyamorous Non-monogamous Into kink/BDSM Religious Not religious Fat Of course, there is nothing problematic about lots of things, but…
Category Archives: Personal Growth
Beginnings, Middles and Endings
I often explore with clients what part of their experiences are most easy and most difficult for them — beginnings, middles or endings? I think most of us have challenges in one or more stages. It is useful to be aware of both our challenges and our strengths. If your strength is beginnings, you might…
How To Say “No”
Many of my clients have struggled with the question of how to say “no” to others.1 Too often, people find themselves overcommitted and resentful and doing things they don’t like. Let’s use an example of a colleague’s asking you to be in charge of a project. You are in charge of several projects right now…
Developing A Supportive Community
Therapists like me provide a lot of support to clients. But, in my opinion, support from a therapist is not enough to create the kind of meaningful, peaceful, connected, vibrant life that most of us want. Even support from a therapy group is not enough. We need more. We need community. A supportive community is…
Dieting and Control
When people suddenly start to talk about wanting to lose weight when they haven’t been talking about it before, I wonder what is going on for them. Frequently, what I find out is they are feeling powerless. It seems to me that dieting1 is often a way for people who feel powerless to assert some…
Stress Management
Many people come to therapy wanting to deal with stress better. There are many articles out there about stress management — but not a lot which have a picture of two guys with bowling balls. Therefore, I felt it was necessary to share my perspective on the topic. There are two categories of stress: Externally…
The Woman, The Bear And The River
There once was a woman who lived in the forest near a large river. She loved to walk in the forest and along the riverbank. Sometimes she enjoyed taking a swim in the cool, clear water. One day, the woman was walking by the river when she heard a loud growl. She turned around and…
To Do: Live Your Life
From time to time it is important to look at the places in our lives that are dead or dying and bring new life to them. Do you feel fully alive most of the time? Or do you sometimes feel sluggish and paralyzed, unable to move towards your goals, unable to really connect with other…
