Estranged relationship: Codependent or enmeshed relationship: Relationship in which there is abuse: Healthy relationship:
Category Archives: Relationships
How To Say “No”
Many of my clients have struggled with the question of how to say “no” to others.1 Too often, people find themselves overcommitted and resentful and doing things they don’t like. Let’s use an example of a colleague’s asking you to be in charge of a project. You are in charge of several projects right now…
Developing A Supportive Community
Therapists like me provide a lot of support to clients. But, in my opinion, support from a therapist is not enough to create the kind of meaningful, peaceful, connected, vibrant life that most of us want. Even support from a therapy group is not enough. We need more. We need community. A supportive community is…
Fun Relationship Experiment #3: Make a List
It’s hard to maintain perspective on relationships with partners. It’s easy to take partners’ good qualities for granted and to be exasperated over and over again by the qualities we don’t like. This relationship experiment is designed to give you a more complete picture of your partner and your relationship than you are likely to…
Fun Relationship Experiment #2: Lighten Up
For every couple there are topics that are difficult to discuss. Perhaps you have a hard time talking about your finances or the housework or your religious observance or how to interact with your kids. Since there is disagreement and conflict in any significant relationship, it is important to learn how to approach tension-filled topics…
Fun Relationship Experiment #1: The Switcheroo
When you are in a relationship it is easy to get stuck in a pattern of having the same fights about the same issues over and over again. It can be so frustrating when important issues seem to never get resolved. It can also be boring — nothing engages you, there’s no new information, and…
Support For People Who Are Depressed
Everyone (including me) always tells depressed people to “get support.” The reality is that when people are depressed, talking to other people about it is sometimes the last thing they want to do. So when someone says, “Get some support!” the depressed person might be thinking, “Support, right. Like that will help. What I need…
Red Flags In Abusive Relationships
When you are in a relationship with someone you love it can be difficult to figure out whether the conflicts in your relationship are abusive or not. If you notice any of the following “red flags” in your relationship, there is a possibility that your relationship could be controlling or abusive. Extreme jealousy — one…
