Category Archives: Depression and Anxiety

9 Tips for Coping with Family Visits and Holidays

Note: If you are going to be in an environment with abusive people, some things on this list may help you but others will not. In such a case, focus on safety planning for yourself. Get a therapist, a friend, or an advocate at a domestic violence program to help you make a plan. Enjoying…

16 Surprising Things That Might Make You Happier

There are a lot of ideas out there about what will make you happier. Some of them are ones we hear about a lot (eg. gratitude). Others are more surprising. Following is a list of 16 surprising things that research has shown might make you happier in some way. Having plants and flowers in your…

What Happens When Fear Wins?

A colleague recently posed an interesting question as a topic for a blog post: What happens when fear wins? My answer: if the fearful part of you “wins” and prevents you from doing something, give that part of you a trophy. And then pay attention to the fearful part because that part is probably really…

Action is Better Than Tea

After there is a mass shooting or other horrifying event, I sometimes see articles written by therapists on how to cope. They talk about self-care, reducing exposure to media and getting support. You know, drink herbal tea, eat right, do some yoga, go to therapy. Things like that. While I am very much in favor…

Seven Ways to Use Your Smartphone to Improve Your Mental Health

Nobody taught me anything about using smartphones when I was in graduate school in the late ’90s. But I’ve counseled a lot of clients since then and found a lot of ways smartphones can be used to support mental health. Here are my top seven. Give yourself supportive messages when you need them. If you…

A Tip for Reducing Anxiety

I recently wrote about how I coped with anxiety when on an airplane trip. On the flight home, I tried another coping strategy that might be helpful for you. I know that airplanes and fear are linked in my brain so when I am on a plane I get scared. There are lots of ways…

How A Therapist Deals With Anxiety

Here I am, on an airplane, dealing with anxiety. I do not like airplane travel. I get scared that the plane will crash. But since I’m on a plane anyhow, I thought this would be a good opportunity to write about how I deal with anxiety. When I feel anxious I want to avoid whatever…

Top 10 Reasons to Get Individual Psychotherapy

Therapy can be great if you have a therapist who is right for you. Are you wondering whether to try individual therapy? Here are some reasons to consider it: You feel stuck in some way and can’t seem to get unstuck no matter how hard you try. A good therapist can help you figure out…

7 Tips For Handling Your Anxiety About Starting Therapy

One challenge in getting psychotherapy for anxiety is that often people are too anxious to go to therapy. After all, beginning therapy involves making phone calls to find a therapist, going to a new place, telling a stranger about your feelings, being vulnerable, and talking about your anxiety — all things that might make people…

Ocean of Feelings

I often compare feelings to the ocean. We stand on the beach and the waves of feelings wash over us and then recede. The problem is that most of us were trained to interfere with this natural process. We avoid the water and stay high up on the hot sand, worried about getting wet. Or…